<body> Glamorous Indie Rock & Roll Is What I need <body>



Tuesday, June 23, 2009
part 3 life of regrets

so people has been streaming to my blog and been reading the parts.. i thank all those who have read and left motivation on my tag board shows that you care =D and to those who chat up at msn! THANKS!


so i left of from pri 6.. where i lost a precious friend and a father figure...

i went on in life to be in zhenghua secondary... with life starting anew...

had to make new friends.. and i did....

sec 1 and sec 2 life seems to be a peak of angst and insanity in my life...

i made friends with a group.. azri, ahmad asyraf, khairul asyraf and also iskandar adi putra...( dunt ask why i put full name.. i remember it more clearly)


well even though we seem so close we were still apart.. my best friend was now azri...

i spent most of my time with him.. i was always around him.. with his crazy life and mine....

well i wasnt much of a guy chasing after girls... but it seems it took a change...

i became like a figure in school.. getting to know all the girls in my batch and also my senior batch...

and also the guys.. but i seem to have been spending more time with the girls i guess...

i remember khairani(sorry if i spelled it wrong!)

and also aini.. my seniors in school and also in ncc...

and also raihana and khadijah....

and i remember how sec 1 was.. i was a midget.. practically the smallest in school.. lolx! and i remember the sec 2's and the trend of having god brother's and sister's

and i constantly getting pinched in the cheeks... sheesh THANKS CHERYL MA! and sabrina.. sadly i dunt think they remembered....

but those were happy moments i could recall off..... back to azri...

well we were best bud's.. but i dunt really have much memories of him.. except for one.. we went to watch a movie... and he was with his girlfriend back then it was fatin... and i was alone....

if i'm not wrong it was lemmony snicket a series of unfortunate events...

and that was went i started to get pissed of myself... i was freaking all alone.. when he could hug fatin and get cosy in the theatres while i was freezing...

and that brought a spark..

where i decided to be so cruel.... i befriended too many girls.. i started going out with them.. i started to go on relationships with no meaning but with lust...

i guess that was when i realised i became a casanova..



but ouhs well what has happened has happened...

sec 1 and sec 2 is the most blurly part of my life.. i was a delinquent

was always with my discipline master... mr.sng...

and i was suspended a number of times.. and had to attend after school programme... LOLX!

and the reason is the most stupidest reason ever... (i didnt do homework..)

and teachers had to put in discipline action.. lolx!

but more to come.. i had too many different friends.. and i dunt seem to be remembering much unless i go into details... but there isnt much to remember from it... and yeah i started to become a passive smoker at the age of 13... (thanks to lepaking with seniors..)

and thanks to me learning to smoke from my grandma...(shhh! that was supposed to be a secret)

and thats how weird life went..

though i spent lots of time with azri, ahmad, khairul, iskandar...

we grew apart once we reached sec 3.. and i was left alone once more and had to start anew and search for a new friend...

sadly sec 3 and life right now.. is easily remembered... so its very very very very very very very very very LONG! so keep updated to the next part!

i estimate there's bout 4 more parts to come.. SO KEEP URSELF POSTED! =D check my msn to see if its updated or not...
Friday, June 5, 2009
part 2 life of regrets

as i promised after a week is where i post my part 2.. im not sure to how many parts there will be but.. im sure its a lot.. but its in stages... i dunt want ppl to get and overload of information... but this is the story of my life..


so it was about my childhood... and now its not about my childhood.. its come to the stage of pre-teen

so i moved on with my life living in bukit panjang...

my life started changing in bukit panjang.. i started to get more friends in bukit panjang...

ppl started noticing me... and i felt wanted and also accepted...

maybe thats the reason why i feel i forgotten the warmth from fauzi.. because he was replaced with someone else...

i transferred to zhenghua primary... and got in 4h

but fauzi wasnt replaced while i was in 4h.. but he was replaced when i was in 5s...

primary 4 life was fun.. but nothing much to say.. i made lots of friends.. and again.. they're chinese.... but they are nice ppl...

and i would like to highlight the name i remember vividly.. sharon...

sorry to those i cant remember.. its not because i forgot you on purpose.. but i forget those who never leave an impact on me...

she felt like an older sister... and she doesnt call me ardy.. she calls me like what my family call me.. nazrul...

dunno why she chose that but im okays with it... ouhs 2 of us are like rivals...

she was a prefect while i was a boy who cant keep his mouth shut! ahahahhaa

we always faught but not in a bad way.. but a war of words...

cool aint it? but its fine she reminded me of fauzi.. fighting over grades and pushing each other to the top...

so thats sharon and me!

but i found a replacement for a big brother.. and his name was farhan...

its the same thing over again... we go to each other's house for enjoyment.. but he made a larger impact on me...

he is family to me... he was the only one who stood by my side though i was shunned by the other malay friends..

at malay class.. i was always being made fun of... and he stood me through thick and thin...

and ppl called me gigi besi back then.. (metal teeth)
they made fun of me wearing braces.. (yes i did wear braces)

but farhan didnt make fun of me.. and whats weird.. he calls me by my full name.. Ardy Nazrul... till now...

but for a change.. in terms of grades.. i was better and i help him...

and when it comes to leisure and joy.. he was better... he was the one who played soccer with me..

and fyi.. i never played soccer before.. untill pri 4... and i learned through my friends... and now i can highlight 2 more names Adi Sufyan and Raden..
they thought me how to play soccer...

ouhs and i forgot to mention.. farhan's family is like my own family to me...

they treated me like a son.. and i will never forget that feeling of having a family...

his mother would scold him if he doesnt learn from me.. and his father would be the one laughing at his mom for how strict she is...

his father was a father i wished i had.. slowly when time pass... we had to split to our separate ways.. it was our psle...

and its litterally a split after psle..

he was in a different stream and he couldnt enter the same school as i had..

but i couldnt go to his school.. because i didnt want to end up not studying..

if its why.. its because.. he went to Assumption English School.. and it is actually a vocation school... and they are many negative influences in his school..

and i chose zhenghua secondary because its reputation seems good... and its a new school.. so i doubt that there would be many negative influences...

but this time both of us had cellphone numbers.. so we could have keep in contact...

and his number was... 81147216 and mine was 81147226 the digits only had one difference...(fyi.. both numbers are not active anymore.. so try calling if you wish too)

we kept in contact till sec 1.. and suddenly i couldnt contact him... i kept calling his house to check on him... but he was usually still in school..

cause he made it to the school's soccer team...

and suddenly i gave up.. only because i had another replacement...

thats part 3 olright but i havent say what i regret...

when i was in sec 3 or 4.. i saw him once more.. and talked to him.... asked him why he didnt keep in contact with me.. and have he changed his number.. cause i kept smsing or calling to see if he was free to hang out...

and he dropped a bomb on me... he said he moved ever since his father passed away...

his father was like a father to me.. as i mentioned previously..

he was the one who wanted to teach me how to play guitar... but i denied him.. saying i rather watch him play and sing....

and the last song i heard him play and sing was Hotel california...

im crying right now as i blog.. i lost someone who was like a father for me...

and i did call him dad a few times before.. and farhan was someone i knew would easily fall into his friends urges.. he is kind hearted and do not want to hurt anyones feelings...

i saw him on the day i previously blog... and he is changed...

am i now wrong for not being his friend being his side? i wanted to be by his side when his father died... i wanted to be by his father's side before he leave this world..

i wanted to take a last glance of his father's corpse and say my prayers for him.. and see him smile even though he is dead... and to reminisce on how well he played the guitar and sing...

if i was by farhan's side back wouldn't everything change?

haiz.. how bout that.. ardy cant bear to look back now.. but he has to learn from the past...

SO guys im not emoing alright? im just looking back for a while...


be right back next week for the next part!
part 1 life of regrets

my life.. is so ever wonderful.. though i am cheerful on the outside most of the time.. my life has been full of regrets...

i couldnt believe it but today made me have a taste of what i wished i had done and not done....

i guess the first regret of my 18 years of life is friends..

i never knew how to make friends.. well its not about making friends...

but i never get those friends that last....

that took care of me.. that cherished me.. that took me as their own family..

i did have friends like that... i remember their names so clearly and how they look like...

the first one was fauzi.. he was my neighbour when i was a child..

how i envy how much attention he get from his parents...

he have everything that i didnt.. and the weirdest part of it..

i learned how to pray(solat) from him and the guidance of his family...

and that was when i was only 4-7 years old.. i dunt have a brother.. and he was one i could treat as a brother..

he had a playstation.. i had toys... we shared those moments...

i would remember me playing with toys with him...

the power ranger megazord fights.. the pretend im a power ranger gimmick and he would borrow the toys i had at home..

and then about the playstation.. i never had one.. up till this point of age.. i do not own any console games

we followed his father's strict rules... if we want to play the playstation... we had to finish our homework and study..

and we did just that.. and boy was he gifted.. he had to memorise long divisions... and multiplications at the age of 6
and he tutored me...

and when we cant play at either of our houses..

we used to adventure around woodlands... with our bicycles.. and cycle all the way to the end of woodlands..
it was living..

and i learned basketball from i guess a sec sch kid... a chinese fella..
he thought me the basics and he also thought me how to do a three pointer

i feel honoured to be having that sort of friend... i remember pri school life..

i was always the outcast.. though im the lively one in class.. the noiseist one too..

but i made no malay friends... i had chinese friends... am i not a malay?

but sadly the friendship had to end.. i had to move to bukit panjang.. i remembered clearly i didnt want to move.. i didnt want to lose fauzi...

he was the only friend i had.. best friend.. a brother... but i was strong.. i did not cry like other kids...

i used up the remaining time i had and spent it with fauzi...

because we made a pact.. "dunt worry ardy take the opportunity to adventure around bukit panjang and when im there you take me on an adventure" thats what fauzi said...

but sadly.. i never kept in contact with him anymore.. because at that age cellphones were not even cheap.. and everyone uses their house phone to keep in contact... so i didnt bother to even call him...

its my fault and thats part of a regret....

and fauzi he turned out to be something diff from what i saw him to be... he was placed express in secondary school thats not what i found as surprising... but he didnt even make it to poly..

was it my fault that he didnt make it to poly? because as i know when we were young we would keep on comparing our grades and motivate each other to study better...

and he was almost always better than me when it came to grades...
so thats part one of my regret



PART 2 will be out after a week of posting.. do visit this blog aite ppl after one week?
Monday, June 1, 2009
hmm updatez....

okays seriously... i dunno what to update... but ouhs well update jek uhs...

hmm anyways its the june holidays for the kiddos... hope they have fun.. sheesh.. and im working my ass off... like normal?

so this wednesday im gonna like get a better job...

my ass hurts my arm hurts my leg hurts.. *damn thats a lot of excuses....*

anyways i cannot take the pay of my current job... its $3.50 per hour.. sadistic right?

man... i really need a better pay... i so deserve more that $3.50 per hour...

but whatever...
next is im gonna be pursuing $5 or more jobs.. and work my ass off..


and reach like minimum $1000 a m0nth... cause i really need that kind of pay..

because im a freaking o lvl holder..

the bare minimum for me is $1000 minus cpf already..

so dunt be such a cheapo company and not pay me accordingly!


anyways i got to know my physical employment status..

also known as pes status...

yeah i got an a...

yay me -_-

ns life will be end of the year or next year.. whenever the letter comes.. LOLX!

klahs nothing much to type...

ouhs ouhs!

DIYANAH IS AN ASS! =X

MUSIC TO THE

HEART

under construction!
will update when i have time!
SCREAM!!


THAT profile

im approximately 167m
my weight is 55kg
Im 18 going 19
AND i do not have any history of medical complications

the bad side of me is
hot tempered..
sarcastic as always
im crazy
i do hold little grudges
i hate the conception of me being lonely and all

BUT I DO HAVE A GOOD SIDE
INDIE ROCK AND ROLL!
im someone who's willing to cry with you when you're down
i can give good advice
im always there for anyone