Glamorous Indie Rock & Roll Is What I need

Friday, March 21, 2008

great luhs.. i lost everyone

how great is it...

i wasnt in the right state of mind yesterday and now... really everyone's gone...

huda went on away from me....

amirah... i dunno what will happen...

but yeah it means a lot to me....

i love huda... but i love amirah...

its just confusing....

i love huda cause she truely cares bout me...

i love amirah cause she's like the only girl that ever take me for who i am....

but now... im just confused... both of them cant make up their mind whether they want me or not... and i just cant wait anymore... its just excruciating pain of seeing them with another guy...

i admit im jealous.. but yeah.. it hurts you know....

i just cant accept it... if you're hitting on me cant you be like serious for once?

i cant be like a friend always unless we want it to be in that position..

but no we're not supposedly friends...

we're closer....

but yet we're wide apart....

i just cant get it..

im not in the right state of mind

why am i like doing things i dunt want too?

argh! im crying at this time for like being so over sensitive...

why am i like emoing at this moment!

i thought i'd move on from my gothic emo self...

but i guess not..

it still is in..

okays fine i admit it right now right here... I LOVE SITI AMIRAH...

to huda... good luck in finding love...

to nadia... good luck on whatever you do just dunt ever like be over the top...

to every other girl... sorry im out of words but yeah i only got 4 words

(COULD YOU FUCK OFF!!!)

okays thank you...

ARDY IS CRAZY AT THE MOMENT...

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

so yeah im sick...

i cant believed i sacrificed myself just to meet huda and was caught in the rain..
whats more i had my napfa test in the morning thus my immune system was a down low...
in the end we didnt meet up (pathetic)

anyways i know what i want and whats best for me....

so yeah should stick to what ever i had done before and do it right...

this time no more interference with any other girls...

MY LIFE IS MINE TO CONTROL!

hmm is things going out the way i want it?

i'll give anyone a chance. ... but would you grab it tight and never let it go...

if you love someone so deeply you wouldnt let him go for someone else...

but if you dunt love him....

then whats the point of me giving a chance knowing it'll end up a disaster...

just think... ive been hurt before ... so yeah you wanna hurt me again?

and if im the one you want will you take the relationship seriously?

ouh well... its up to you...

im not gonna waste my effort to get you back...
but i want you to prove me wrong.. prove me that it will be meaningful...

cause im lost in my own world of feelings which is so full of pain...

if you love me.. you know what to do...

Sunday, March 16, 2008

now its the truth!

wow! today is what i called a superbly irritating day for me!

today was my band showcase... and the turn out wasnt half bad... hahahha

anyways yeah lots to say....

i took out my own pocket money just to rent a snare drum...

yeah $15 burned!
theres more to it...

i had to go all the way to yishun in the morning and all and its like 1 hr just to reach and 1 hr to return...

so yeah basically i was super damn bored and tired...

and the snare was like 10kg....

imagine holding it in a bus and standing with no seats...

anyways the showcase went well...

wow... looks like i aint got nowhere to go....

everything is getting complicated...

luckily im so over with relationships....

or else i'll be stuck with mixed emotions and heartbreak...

anyways yeah... cant believe i had hope in a relationship....

but its okays friends remain friends =)...

ouh well thats all for the crappiness... take care everybody..

Saturday, March 15, 2008

sometimes its better not to blabber...

yeah i screwed up big time...

anyways.... if i took everything as a joke i wouldnt be here... haiz...

im like woking my pants of for my band's sake...

im even forking out my own money just for renting a snare... other than that im like stuck with work.... you noe....

special place in the heart doesnt mean its a good thing....

huda has a special place in my heart for what she's done... its not a good thing...

its a scar of which will always stay in my heart and always be remembered...

im not putting any hopes for you huda... if you think i am... please dunt ...

what you've done is a rather big upset for me... and i dunt want to regret of having the same mistake again...

if i do... i'll slaughter myself...

amirah please dunt think as if im just a hypocrite... im not even doing anything much...

i told you the facts and i didnt hide anything from you...

so yeah this part of being understanding is what i meant...

haiz...!!

and you're disgusted by me doing this...

haiz......

Friday, March 14, 2008

fuh! stress!

im like foowee lots of stuff happening here and there sia.... there's like tons to do and such little time to spare

yeah! getting my laptop in two days! lets hope its really two days and not two working days... if two working days it might mean i'll only get it on monday... haiz! wth

anyways im so excited..... gonna start school soon and its like FINALLY!!!!

FINALLY FREE FROM THE BURDEN OF DOING NOTHING BUT SLEEPING!

kaes thats mostly it.... anyways it seems a certain some is rather upset... haiz wonder what did i do..

Thursday, March 13, 2008

hmm i feel weird..

wah... yeah i went out with huda today....

ish... its been a long time since i met her....

hahahaha weird thing to ever happen... yeah treated her to a movie... i didnt manage to do much when we were together so yeah i have to make it up to it....

been busy with work and yeah poly admission... its so stressful this days... i got so many things occuring last minute...

ouh and going out with her was really what i call coincidence.... we've not been in contact for like months and i dunt even call her or anything... pure coincidence... but ouh well at least she has a special place in my heart even though all the shit ive been through... =) ouh yeah im sorry if i made ur danny jealous or anything ... if i knew i wouldnt have asked you out... =(

im just got my first day off after 2 weeks of working... and yes im sorry for not updating regularly...

its rather irritating to be tired and not in the mood to blog... though i had much to say...
so yeah i'll try to get used to be updating regularly...

after all i'll get my laptop tmr!

haha!

yeah tmr im going to ngee ann for my laptop and also my medical check up...

didnt knew mechatronics needed to do such a thing before entering the course itself...

yeah to me for going to the National Cadet Corps 55th Cadet Leiutenant course!

I'll be christen with the name Sir Ardy Nazrul!

haha! so for those who noe me well or have seen my old posts yeah there are mentions of why i want to be a CLT and also why it has been a big deal for me to be a Leiutenant

ouh so much to blog bout yet so lazy to type more...

shall blog more tmr after work or after getting my laptop! wee!!!!!!!

take care ppl!

MUSIC TO THE

HEART

under construction!
will update when i have time!

SCREAM!!

THAT profile

im approximately 167m
my weight is 55kg
Im 18 going 19
AND i do not have any history of medical complications

the bad side of me is
hot tempered..
sarcastic as always
im crazy
i do hold little grudges
i hate the conception of me being lonely and all

BUT I DO HAVE A GOOD SIDE
INDIE ROCK AND ROLL!
im someone who's willing to cry with you when you're down
i can give good advice
im always there for anyone